Sonya Elliott

Back on the Court

AUTHOR & BASKETBALL FANATIC

PEACELOVEBASKETBALL & PEN TO PAPER: Writing Wisdom

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When I was coaching I gave journals to all of my players and to the kids who came to our summer camps. I found that writing was a good way for them to set personal goals, learn about team concepts and discover things about themselves and each other.

Some players cherished their journals and even brought them home and used them on their own throughout the season. Others simply left them in their lockers for the times when we had organized writing exercises and goal settings. But I loved that every time we wrote in the journals, noses went straight to the page and pens where scratching away. The girls had things to say, thoughts to be written. I believe that all the players and campers benefitted from the experience in one way or another as it gave them the opportunity to delve into their thoughts on the importance of teamwork, attitude and work ethic, and also gave them a space for personal introspection and self-evaluation.

For the high school teams, I had the players write down basketball goals as well as some life goals, and then I tried to give a variety of thought provoking writing prompts. I used questions like: What does team mean to you? Give three things that you can do to help our team be successful this year. Name three goals you have for this season. What steps will you take to achieve these goals? What are three goals (non-basketball related) that you would like to accomplish this year in school? What would you like to be doing in five years? There are so many options to get your team thinking.

Journaling for campers (4th– 8thgraders) was similar, I just added questions that were a little easier to answer and to discuss if the girls wanted to. I used some questions similar to the ones above and added questions like: If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? If you could be an animal, what would you be and why? What is something that you learned at camp today? What makes you happy? Write about someone who is special to you. Share a time when you helped someone. How did it make you feel?

Whether you’re a coach or a player (or anyone really), try using a journal, take time to look inside and reflect on your life and see what happens.

WRITING PROMPT: Choose one of the prompts above and get writing!

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Believe Journal $19.17

PEACELOVEBASKETBALL: Knowledge is Power – Share It

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I’ve read a lot of books about coaching basketball and over the years I have attended many coaches clinics and I love learning about the game and getting different perspectives. As coaches we have certain preferences, but it only helps to check out different options and opinions, and then pick and choose the bits and pieces that fit our needs. Whether we are talking about the X’s and O’s or overall team concepts, knowledge is power.

I am currently building a Coaches Toolkit page on my website with basic information for basketball coaches, such as free downloads of court diagrams, practice plan forms, and beginner basketball basics. The page will also include some of my favorite books such as The Complete Guide to Coaching Girls’ Basketball: Building a Great Team the Carolina Way by Sylvia Hatchell, Reach for the Summit: The Definite Dozen System for Succeeding at Whatever You Do by Pat Summitt and  They Call Me Coach by John Wooden to name a few. I will also be adding links to blogs and websites, and I’m looking for recommendations.So if you have basketball books, blogs or websites that you like, please comment below and I’ll take a look.

Thanks so much!

PEACELOVEBASKETBALL: Life Rules

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A friend asked me to help coach a 6th grade boys basketball team this fall. A couple of years ago I stepped down as Varsity Head Coach of the West Seattle High School girl’s program and I wasn’t sure I wanted to coach again, but when I stepped onto the court and saw the boys hustling across the floor at tryouts, I knew it was the right decision. When I got home, I went straight to my office, pulled open my coaching file and started planning. I scanned the first three documents in my coaching notebook, Westside Big 5, West Seattle Practice Rules and “10 to Win” Westside Rules of Defense, two of the three have nothing to do with basketball skills, a reminder to me of what coaching is truly about, teaching life skills.

Whether your players are in grade school or college there’s more to teach than just the fundamentals. Don’t get me wrong, I have coached for 25 years, and I love the fundamentals, I’m a stickler for the fundamentals, but I try to build a team mentality and have some fun along the way. At the varsity level there is an emphasis on winning, but what made our 2015 West Seattle team strong in the end, what got them to go undefeated in league and find success at the State level, was a belief in one another. This team mentality and positive attitude was backed with pride and sportsmanship. And, if you asked the girls, I believe they would say they are grateful for their experience and their teammates.

I’ll only have these 6th grade boys for a short practice once a week, and I will focus on the fundamentals and try to have some fun. But I also hope to instill a positive work ethic, teach sportsmanship and promote togetherness and pride for one another. Maybe only God or some higher being can do all that, but if I can touch upon some of it over the next few weeks than I’ll feel satisfied, then I’ll have done my job.

*Feel free to download any of the documents above and implement what you like into your basketball program.

Coach Elliott with her daughter and West Seattle player Charli (2015)

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Register for Team Awesome Basketball Leadership Academy

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Do you want to improve your game and get inspired for next season?  Team Awesome Basketball Leadership Academy has the perfect summer basketball camp for young women. Not only will you be coached by women coaches and college-student athletes, you will learn about what it takes to improve all aspects of your game.

Basketball Education in Action is partnering up with the Seattle Storm and Witnessing Greatness Sports to bring a unique, transformational experience. The Team Awesome Basketball Leadership Academy (TABLA) empowers girl athletes by developing communication, leadership, and advocacy skills through basketball.

Dates: July 17 – 21, 2017

  • Leadership, Advocacy, and College Experience Panels & Workshops
  • Innovative Drills with Women Coaches & College Student-Athletes
  • Play in the Key Arena & Chalk Talk with Storm Leadership Team
  • Observe WNBA All-Star Practice
  • FREE TIckets to Storm Game (7/18) & Campers Honored at Center Court
  • FREE tickets to the WNBA All-Star Game on July 22

REGISTER NOW

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Let’s Just Play Ball and Leave Acting for the Stage

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DSC_0708 - Version 2I love basketball, but sometimes these days I wonder what is happening to the integrity of the game. What’s up with all the cheap play and dramatic antics? I watch it happen in games at every level, professional, college, and high school, as well as in my women’s rec-league.

Are you wondering what I’m talking about?

Let me explain by giving you a few examples. Recently before one of my daughter’s college games, she rolled her eyes and said, “Wait until you see #44 from the other team. She flops during every play, trying to draw a foul.” And sure enough during the game, play after play; this young woman (and a couple of other women from the team) threw themselves to the floor, arms flailing. I found myself hollering at the refs, “She’s flopping! That’s not a foul! Are you kidding me?” I was annoyed and I wasn’t even the coach. It reminded me of when I was coaching at the State Tournament last year and my daughter was guarding one of the best players in the state. While coaching I had a front row seat, and I watched as the girl literally grabbed my daughter’s wrist, pulled it into her jersey and then threw my daughter’s arm to the sky, as she heaved her own body to the floor. My daughter got the foul. I consider this cheap, and awfully close to dirty. I was appalled.

Tuesday, at a boys high school game, I watched, as over and over, a point guard dribbled to the side of his defender, and while bobbing his head up and down he’d slow a bit and flail his body around in a way that I suppose was suggesting to the referee that he was getting fouled. To me it looked as if he was having a seizure, and I thought, really? Who taught this kid to do that? Why not just dribble around the player, cut to the middle of the floor and look for a teammate to pass it to, so we can score? Why all the drama? Just play ball.

Why cant we just play the game? Not look for ways to cheat it? So many players these days drive to the basket with one thing in mind, to draw a foul. Not to make a layin, or to stop and pop a nice jumper, or better yet to draw the defense and pass to a teammate. Players are taught to simply attack the basket, which can be a good thing, but many are out of control and looking for a bail out, a foul to be called. Just watch a game and see how often players who drive to the hole are leaning so hard into the defender with their head down, that there is really no way that they can even see the basket. By the time these players get near the hoop they are often parallel to the floor as they fling the ball up and flail to the ground. Is this really a shot?

Should all these antics be part of the game? There are those (even my husband at times) who argue that this is smart basketball. I wouldn’t call it smart basketball, I call it cheap basketball and it rubs me the wrong way. Unfortunately, I’m not sure that you can totally get rid of it, but it has made me happy to see more and more referees hold their whistle as they watch kids toss themselves on the floor, rather than calling a foul. So there is hope.

Am I getting old? Set in my ways? Maybe a little, but I love this game and to add this crazy drama, seems disrespectful. There is something to be said about having players and teams focus on helping each other and simply playing the game. Yes, you want to be smart on the court, step in front of a drive to draw an offensive foul, play hard and be strong with the ball when you go to the hoop, that sort of thing, but do we have to try to win an Oscar on every play? Let’s leave acting for the stage and just play good hard basketball.

 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Tired Team? Time For Some TLC

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This part of the season can get long, for both players and coaches. I’m not coaching this year, but my daughter reminded me of the fact yesterday (I’m visiting her at college where she is playing basketball). She said that she and her teammates are all really tired right now and having a hard time getting motivated. Suddenly I was transported back my years as a coach, and I remembered the look on the players faces, uninspired, distracted, anxious (finals were usually taking place at this time) and bored. They were burnt out and tired. Tired, not because they were out of shape (like my husband insisted) but mentally fried. It happened every year.

This was always the moment that I felt the urge to run them until they wanted to cry. Go all “old school” on them. (Which I did from time to time, a few extra sets of lines never hurt), but at this time of the year, when we were a week or two away from playoffs, I knew what the team really needed was some TLC.

Tender loving care is like a reboot when players are mentally tired of the game. The burn out tends to be worse with a team that’s been loosing a lot, but it happened to my high school team that went undefeated in league. Plain and simple, basketball season is long. A good hard practice is important, of course, but by this point in the year, I kept practices focused, quick paced and short. With one key addition…more fun. From team building activities, to team dinners, to half court shooting competitions (which goes against my grain a little but the kids always love it), I looked for ways to remind the players that basketball is FUN!

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Opportunity

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Recently, when I was frustrated with the way I was playing, I reminded myself of how lucky I am just to be on the basketball court, working out and hanging out with my teammates. So I dug a little deeper and kept at it and when the game was over (though we lost by two points) I was thankful that I had been there. Thankful that I can still play this game that I love.

When you’re frustrated with your game. Keep working and remind yourself of why you play.

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Keeping The FUN In fundamentals!

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Are you coaching young kids? Ones who don’t know anything about basketball? This can be a challenge, even more so if you played basketball at a higher level, because honestly it’s hard to remember the little parts of the game once they’ve become second nature.

I remember when a friend asked if I would coach our girls when they were in third grade, first I asked my daughter if she wouldn’t mind having me as her coach, then after accepting the position, I sat down and thought a lot about how to best use an hour of practice time with these young ladies. I had played basketball through college and had coached high school for many years, so I knew the game (and I was competitive), but I wanted these grade school girls to learn the game and have fun.

I started with the fundamentals on the court, doing my best to keep a basketball in their hands a majority of the time while I coached dribbling, passing and shooting, and added an emphasis on hard work, defense and togetherness. But I also taught some of the basics that are often forgotten, because I remember being frustrated when I went to high school and played volleyball for the first time. I didn’t understand the terms and rules of the game. I learned the rules of the game and how subbing worked the hard way, by doing it all wrong and getting yelled at. My coach even thought I was joking when I asked what side-out meant. I was not joking. I wanted the girls who I coached to understand all aspects of the game of basketball.

But most of all I wanted them to have fun. I love basketball and I wanted them to love it too. Of course I knew that all the girls might not continue to play, that one day they might find different sports or activities that they were passionate about, but at that moment, in grade school, it was all about having fun.

To teach them the lines and areas of the court I would holler out a term. For the corner of the key on the free-throw line, I would holler “Elbow!” And girls would run to an elbow and do a cheer together. The key word is together because there are four possible Elbow locations on the court. Then I might call out “Baseline!” (Which only has two options, the out-of-bound lines behind each basket). The girls who knew the term would grab other girls hands and together decided where to run before gathering in a circle and shouting out a team cheer. A little team building along the way is always good. Simple, but perfect, when a group is young. They quickly learned where things are on the court, the free-throw line, the key, hash marks, center court, etc. You get the idea.

I also gave the girls labeled handouts showing the areas of the basketball court and added a sheet defining basketball terms. Each player recieved an easy basketball quiz and word search game as well. “Fun” homework. We went over them but I never asked for them back because I knew some girls would hate them and probably never touch them (this would have been me as a kid), but some girls loved the paperwork. Every kid’s is a little different so I decided it didn’t hurt to come at them in different ways to learn more about the game.

So when your players are young, teach them the fundamentals of basketball and the basics of game, give every kid quality time in games (if they come to practice) and most of all, have fun.

 

FREE BASKETBALL HANDOUTS

PeaceLoveBasketball Basics for Beginners-1 (Elementary)

PeaceLoveBasketball Basics for Beginners-2 (Elementary)

PeaceLoveBasketball Quiz for Beginners (Elementary)

PeaceLoveBasketball Word Search for Beginners (Elementary)

PeaceLoveBasketball Proper Shooting Form

PeaceLoveBasketball Basketball Player Self-Evaluation Form (Middle/High School)

PeaceLoveBasketball Summer Shooting Challenge form

PeaceLoveBasketball Full Court Diagram (coaches)

PeaceLoveBasketball Half Court Diagram (coaches)

 

 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Inspired to Work Hard

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photoLast week I talked about hanging up my basketball shoes. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to play the way I want to play. And though I’ve found that this is how it works as I get older and don’t practice much, this feeling would hit me on occasion even when I was young. I LOVE basketball, but there were many times during my career when I went through slumps, times I literally feared the free throw line because I knew that my shot wouldn’t go in. One slump was so bad that during an overtime game against Idaho State, the entire opposing bench (including their coaches) yelled out, “foul number 10,” when they needed our team to go to the line so that they might have a chance to get the ball back.

I was #10.

It took a long time to recover from that, but the one thing that I found helped the most was, to do my best to clear my mind of the negative thoughts (that were mostly coming from me at that point), and simply keep working hard. Basketball is not an easy game and there are so many pieces that need to come together in a constantly changing environment, that it takes a lot of practice. And even with a lot of practice, you can never get everything perfect, just better. So if you’re struggling and wondering why you play this game, instead of stepping away from it, put some more time in on the court and you’ll not only improve, but you’ll find what it was that drew you to the game to begin with, why you play. It’s there that you will find inspiration.

The first time I went to see a basketball game when I was a young kid, I remember telling my mom, “I want to play basketball.” It looked like so much fun and when I started to play, I discovered that it was fun. I have been playing ever since. So in my most recent game, I reminded myself of my love of the game and hit the court with a new energy. I played a little better, closer to my old self, but more important, I had a blast.

I guess I will keep my basketball shoes after all.

 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Did I Make The Team Coach?

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Basketball tryouts can be tough on everyone involved. As a kid trying out for a team, you’re stressed about making sure you do your best and not allowing your nerves to affect your performance so that you can make the team. As a coach you worry about selecting teams while giving every player a fair shake with a short time period to evaluate, and as a parent you watch while your child weather’s the storm and you function as their anchor, or at least that is the hope.

If you are a player reading this blog, I wish you all the best. Take a deep breath and hit the court with intensity and a positive attitude. And no matter the result, if you give your very best, that is all that really matters. If you don’t make the team or the level of team that you thought you should, it might hurt deep in your soul, but if you gave your all, there can be no regrets. Tears and frustration maybe, but no regrets. Instead, if you love basketball, use this as fuel to work harder over the next year, or if you’re not sure if basketball is your thing, use the opportunity to try something new that peaks your interest. Use this pivotal point in your life as inspiration. What is important to you? What do you really love to do?

If you’re a parent, it’s time to support your child. Be there for them no matter what happens. If they don’t make the team it will surely be a life changing experience, so help it to be a positive one. And if your son or daughter doesn’t end up making Varsity, that’s okay, they can have fun and learn to grow as person and a player on the JV or C-Team. Will they always like what team they ended up on? No. Will you? Possibly not. But, just as in life, you don’t always get what you want, so it is important for your child to learn from the experience and to understand how to make the best of any situation. This is when a parent’s reaction can make all the difference in the world. This is a time for your child to grow, perhaps as a player, and for sure as a person.

A coach works to build the strongest team possible, while teaching young athletes the game. Their focus is on many, not one, so not every player will be happy all the time. I hated being on the bench my first year in high school. But I had to learn that sometimes I didn’t get what I wanted. With support from my parents, I stayed positive and worked hard all of that season and during the next summer and by the following year I was starting. A year is a long time for a teenager to wait and work, but that experience taught me a lot about life and about myself.

My parents were always supportive when I struggled as a kid, yet they let me find my way. Maybe it was just their way of doing things or maybe it was the fact that they knew that one day I would have to live my life, and face challenges and make decisions on my own. This is not an easy thing to do, to support your child while letting them find their way. But it can be done and the results can be amazing.

Last season I had a Senior who played JV and a Senior who played C-team. Often coaches won’t allow seniors on lower level teams because their attitudes can drag the team down if the player carries anger about not being on varsity, but both of these Seniors were excellent leaders on their teams, improved as athletes and had great experiences playing basketball. They both made me proud in the way they represented themselves and our program. Both had supportive parents. I know it’s not always easy to sit back as a parent if you feel your child deserves more, but take a moment to think about the way in which you support them. Ask yourself if it is benefitting them.

I had to remind myself of this recently. My daughter, who is now in college, was not playing with varsity after the first week of tryouts and I’d seen her play with the team at open gym and was surprised. After coaching her for many years, I know what she is capable of, but I also know that the things that she does on the court are not noticeable at first glance. She’s not a fancy ball handler or shooter. She plays tough defense, gets rebounds and steals. She does the grunt work.

I wanted to call her coach and say, “Hey, you are really missing out…” and send videos of her from the state tournament, but instead I told my daughter, “You’re a freshman, just keep working, it will pay off. It may not be this year but you’ll get your chance just keep working.” Inside I was bummed for her but instead of fueling her with negative energy, I supported her and gave her my suggestion. A couple of weeks later she texted that she’d made the varsity. She was lucky that her work paid off so quickly, it could have taken a year or perhaps never, but staying positive was her best bet to make the situation move toward a good ending.

So whether you are in the midst of tryouts or supporting someone who is, stay positive and remind yourself that experiencing tryouts will teach you or your child important lessons about themselves and how best to live their life.

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PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Protect Our Kids…because the title of this blog could have easily been… “Another High School Football Player Seriously Injured.”

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Protect our kids

I saw the hit coming. I was at the top of the stadium watching my son’s high school football game and my stomach clenched as he ran a slant across the middle of the field while a freight train was headed in his direction. The F’word formed on my lips before the hit even happened, before my son leaped up to catch the pass, open and defenseless, to the oncoming hit. A hard tackle would have been bad, but I watched as a kid rammed his helmet into my son’s head and then pushed him to the ground. My son’s arms went slack and his body limp as he fell. The proud defender looked down upon him. I wanted to vomit.

I had just been telling another mom that I hated having to play these final games, when our high school had been eliminated from the playoffs. How I had wanted to be done with football this year. I was looking forward to basketball season and an opportunity for my son to grow and get stronger, make it safer for him to be playing football when the next season came around. He had even scheduled to meet with a trainer to better prepare himself for his junior year. But strength wouldn’t have helped him this night, strength wouldn’t have stopped that targeted hit. The bottom line is, changes need to take place in how the game of football is played, especially at the high school level.

My son has been throwing a football since he was three years old. Every time we go on a family walk, a football is in tow. Football is a part of family life at the Elliott house. I didn’t grow up around the game myself, in my family, football was soccer, but when I was in high school, I supported our team and then later I met my husband at Eastern Washington University where he was playing football. He played college ball, was an All-State quarterback in high school and has coached the game. He loves the game and knows the game inside and out, but I was wishing I’d never heard of the game as I made myself take the stadium steps one at a time to the field. I have spent years as a coach so I know better than to run out on the field like a crazy mom. But I was going crazy on the inside. I wanted to run out and make sure my son was still alive.

The trainers had him surrounded. I walked out and knelt behind them before I saw him move. It took him awhile to sit up. A wave of relief washed through my body but it was followed by more fear. He could not walk away unscathed from a hit like that. I held my breath.

The trainers escorted him to the sidelines. He knew his name, where he was, the basics. The trainers were concerned but optimistic. I was skeptical. He rode home with the team. My ride home with my husband was silent (which NEVER happens), that is until we reached our house. “We got lucky tonight,” He said. I felt it too. There have been six deaths from high school football injuries this year. Again I felt sick.

When I picked my son up from school he acted okay, and when he went to bed that night he seemed fine, but as a coach I’ve had my concussion training, I knew to keep an eye out for symptoms. My husband couldn’t sleep. I woke to find him in his office writing an email titled, “The title of this email could have easily been…”Another High School Football Player Seriously Injured.” He was not only angry and upset that his son was hurt, but he was angry because that night, as he worked the chains on the football field, he’d had to listen to the opposing coaches and players hoot and holler and high-five one another about the “great” hit that left his son unmoving on the field. He was angered by the fact that the game that he loves so dearly had come to this. What had happened to football that was now making it so dangerous? Yes, concussions are a part of the game, but what he had witnessed was not football. It was not a good tackle. A good tackle would have hurt, maybe could have caused a concussion as the player fell to the ground, but when there is intent to use the head and target a player, it is not a good tackle and the chances that something bad will happen are great.

What is the solution? My husband believes that there needs to be a big shift in the rules and officiating concerning tackling. In our area, high school football currently has rules against leading with the head, yet after my son was hit, the only action taken was a 15 yard penalty. My husband believes that a player who makes a targeted hit should be ejected from the game and kept out for one or two more games. Discouraging these vicious hits, by referees and coaches, is where this change must begin. Yes, proper tackling technic is important, but rules and strict enforcement, must be set to keep our kids safe.

Changes must happen now. Even at the professional level changes are happening. Two days after my son was hit, Seahawk Ricardo Lockette, was brought down by a similar tackle while covering a punt. It made me nauseous to watch. The announcer talked about punts being one the last parts of the game, at the professional level, where changes need to happen to remove dangerous hits. If rule changes are happening to protect professional athletes, then they need to happen at the high school level to protect our children.

My son’s concussion symptoms came the following night. I’d made him rest and turn off electronic devices most of the day and when he felt fine that evening we let him meet his buddies for a while, it was Halloween. But later that night the headaches started. The next day was a stronger headache and drowsiness. Then more headaches, drowsiness and difficulty with classwork continued throughout the week.

The average recovery time for a concussion is 2-6 weeks. He will miss his last football game (I’m not so sad about that, but he is bummed), and he’s hoping he’ll be ready for basketball tryouts in a week and a half. We’ve been to the urgent care clinic, the ER and we’re following up next week with the Seattle Sports Concussion Program so we can get a comprehensive understanding of his future, because this is my son’s third concussion and while the kid that hit him is able to play tonight, my son is not only out until his concussion is better, he might be done with football.

I know that I am lucky. My son will be okay. But I have seen far too many concussions with football players in recent years and when it comes closer to home it scares you into action. Let’s work to change the future of high school football. To change and enforce the rules in a way that will make the game safer for our children.

Contact your local Interscholastic Athletic Association today.

In the state of Washington contact the WIAA. CLICK HERE

 …also happening this month in the seattle area

Community Forum on Safety in Sports  |  Monday, November 16, 2015  |  7-8:30 p.m.

Join Q13 Fox anchor Marni Hughes as she moderates a panel discussion focused on safety in sports with an emphasis on signs, symptoms and treatment of head injuries. The panel discussion will be followed by questions from the audience. Parents, coaches and players are encouraged to attend. Event is open to the public.

For more information about the event, CLICK HERE.

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Patience

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Sonya Elliott

I played basketball with a group of high school girls at open gym this week. A great workout for me, and whether they liked it or not (between my huffing and puffing) the girls got some coaching. Not super serious coaching, more encouragement and reminders, but I just couldn’t help myself. Once a coach always a coach.

“Nice look.” “Sweet Pass.” “Stay between your man and the basket.”

I’d set a screen away and make them think about movement away from the ball. Remind them, and myself, to stay low, jump to the ball, block out. As much as I don’t like getting old and being a little out of shape, not being able to do what I wanted to do, exactly when I wanted to do it, emphasized for me how important patience is, as a player and as a coach, because it’s not always easy to do things right.

There is a lot to learn on the basketball court. You have to move the ball up the court by dribbling and passing and run different offenses and defenses. It takes tons of practice to get it right on a regular basis and even with practice, with the repetition and reminders of how the game is played, mistakes happen.

So if you are frustrated with your play on the basketball court (or with your writing, or your production at work, or your ability to stay in a yoga pose, or anything in life) remind yourself to be patient. If you are a coach and you’re not happy with how your team is doing, assess the weak points of the team and make sure your drills work to strengthen those weakness, but understand that it will take time and remind yourself that your players and your team will never be perfect.

Be patient.

No matter how hard a person or a team works, the game is ever-changing, life is ever-changing, and because of that, on the court, and in life, remember to be patient with those around you and be patient with yourself.

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Offense sells the tickets. Defense wins the games.

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Sonya Gaubinger Elliott - Eastern Washington University - 1987
Sonya Gaubinger Elliott – Eastern Washington University – 1987

A quote that has always been a driving force in the way I play basketball, and coach basketball, is, “Offense sells the tickets. Defense wins the games.” I LOVE defense. I love playing it, and there is nothing better than coaching or watching a team that plays intense and cohesive team defense.

Personally, I was not born a good shooter, which may have something to do with my preference for defense. But even as my shooting improved with practice, my defense is what got me into the game, and made things happen on the court, and I always had it to focus on if my shot was off. You can always play tough defense if you’ve got heart and hustle. And when you play tough defense, it will spread like wildfire to your teammates. And when each and every player on a team is working together, it is a beautiful thing.

When you’re on the court make sure to put as much, or more, energy into the game when you are on the defensive end of the court (or if you’re a coach emphasize defense), because if the other team can’t score, the final score will of course, be in your favor.

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Practice + Heart + Hustle = Reaching Your Dreams

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Since becoming a parent, I’ve realized that, to a certain degree, each and every one of us is hardwired at birth. Born with certain tendencies. My son and daughter have different wiring, different ways about doing things, even though they were raised in the same house. But no matter your hardwiring, there’s an equation to living that will help you in following your hopes and dreams, practice plus a whole lot of heart and hustle.

If, for example, your dream is to make the varsity basketball team for your school, you’ve got to put the work in, practice. Get up early, or stay up late, and go to the YMCA or the closest park to shoot and work on your ball handling, expand your knowledge and go to camps or ask your coach for help, go to open gyms and consider select team options, put in the work. If you want to write a book, write, take classes, read books, put in the work. If you want to learn a language, take lessons and practice, put in the work. You get the idea.

And then there is Heart and Hustle. These make all the difference in the world when you’re on the basketball court. Playing with heart means pushing yourself to be your best, as well as inspiring your teammates. Playing with heart moves you to go above and beyond, to fill the lane every time down the court, to trap like the Tasmanian Devil, to dive after loose balls. Heart and hustle will get you through the good and bad of each and every practice. If you play with heart, win or loose, you will leave a game with no regrets. Don’t get me wrong, you may have wanted to play better, to have done a few things differently, you should have wanted to win the game, but if you have “left it all on the court”, played with all your heart, there should be no regrets, only thoughts on how to prepare for the next game. And you go back to the start…more practice.

When you are chasing dreams in life, dive in with all your heart. “How do I do that?” You ask. “Where do I find Heart?” It’s in each and every one of us. It’s not always easy to find, but it’s there. Close your eyes, breath deeply and ask yourself what’s important to you and allow yourself some time to answer. When you find that answer, when you’ve found that which is important to YOU, you have found the path to your heart and you will have extra strength and energy within you to follow your dreams.

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Get Ready for Basketball Season!

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Basketball season is around the corner and for the first time in a long while I’m not preparing to coach, but instead preparing to watch. Simply watching is bound to keep me busy as I will be supporting my son and the boys basketball team, and of course I will be cheering on the high school girls team that I used to coach, and though I will miss being a part of their season as their coach, not coaching will also allow me to travel and watch my daughter who is playing basketball in college. I can’t wait!

If you’re a fan, parent, coach, or a player, here are some great basketball books to get you pumped up and ready for the season!

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In These Girls, Hope is a Muscle (Memoir) by Madeleine Blais

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Brief Garland (Memoir) by Harold Keith

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Back on the Court : a young woman’s triumphant return to life, love & basketball (Memoir) by Sonya G. Elliott

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Counting Coup: A True Story of Basketball and Honor on the Little Big Horn by Larry Colton (Memoir)

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Standing Tall: A Memoir of Tragedy and Triumph (Memoir/Coaching) by C. Vivian Stringer

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Sacred Hoops: Spiritual Lessons of a Hardwood Warrior (Memoir/Coaching) by Phil Jackson

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They Call Me Coach (Coaching) by John Wooden

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Reach for the Summit (Coaching) by Pat Summitt

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Blind Your Ponies (Novel) by Stanley Gordon West

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Sue Bird: Be Yourself (Basketball Positively for Kids) by Sue Bird

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Whose Game Is It, Anyway?: A Guide to Helping Your Child Get the Most from Sports, Organized by Stage and Age (Parents) by Amy Baltzell

 

On my basketball reading list:

  • Play Their Hearts Out by George Dohrmann
  • The Last Shot by Darcy Frey
  • Venus to the Hoop by Sara Corbett.
  • Don’t Put Me In Coach: My Incredible NCAA Journey From The End Of The Bench To The End Of The Bench by Mark Titus

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Peace

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Yesterday my yoga instructor invited the class to choose an Intention for the day. I breathed in, my body and mind was tight, it has seemed that way for some time. Into my mind came the word PEACE. I thought, “How corny. Really? Peace is what you come up with Sonya?” But I closed my eyes, and again it was Peace that resonated for me. Peace that I needed.

As we all know, life is busy. I don’t think my life is any busier than anyone else’s, but I haven’t been able to find the peace and calm that is so important to me, especially in the midst of chaos. I write, model, chauffeur kids (well, now down to one), fix and manage rental houses and over the past twenty plus years I’ve been coaching as well. And during my last few years as a head coach, not only did amazing things happen, but a lot of negative energy was thrown in my direction by a group of parents and it made finding peace a little more difficult.

This part of my time coaching is not something I write about very often because I do my best to keep out the bad energy, but it comes up for me from time to time since I live in the neighborhood, and attend events at the high school where I coached, so I often see these parents. It’s not easy to forgive and forget.

The old sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me, is only partially true. The recent Mindful Magazine article The Stickiness of Misinformation, explains that once a lie has been told, it sticks in the mind, and if continually repeated is seen as a truth. The repetition even emphasizes the lie. The lie becomes a truth in people’s minds. Political Scientist Adam Berinsky says, “Rumors acquire their power through familiarity. Merely repeating a rumor,”—including rebuking it—“ increases its strength.” More reason not to go there, not to talk about the lies.

Recently, when the mother of one of my former players was at her daughter’s Select Basketball games she was asked, “You must be so happy that your daughter’s old coach stepped down?” He had heard rumors. “No. Quite the opposite.” She replied. This parent had believed the lies. The lies had become truth.

I have a thick skin. Coaching (and Modeling) has done that to me. Still, have hateful rumors made it more difficult for me to find peace? At times. But recently I was invited to an event for The Innocence Project, a national litigation and public policy organization dedicated to freeing innocent prisoners using DNA and other new evidence and reforming the criminal justice system to prevent future injustice, and it made me think of how difficult it must be to find peace and forgiveness and to move forward with life when such a wrong has been placed upon you, when 10, 20, 40 years or more of your life has been wrongly spent in prison, away from your family and friends, and it opened my mind that much more to just letting go.

Should I care what others think or say? No, not when my heart is in the right place. But is it always easy? Of course not. Fortunately I have the support of many friends, family, and players who know me and know the love and energy I have put into coaching over the years. So yesterday when I closed my eyes to block out the craziness of the day and focus on my intention of Peace, I thought of those people, the good that surrounds me and the good in my heart, to find my calm. To find Peace.

How do you find peace? Who supports you in finding peace in your life?

 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Giving It Up

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I played basketball the other day with my husband and some friends. My husband and I were teamed together, and when we are on the same team I tend to make him do the inside work. He is a good five inches taller than me. But when we were on a fast break he called for that ball earlier than normal and reminded me, “Give up the ball and I’ll get it back to you.” Ah, so true. The basic Give & Go. (If only I could move my 49-year-old body fast enough to fill the break to get it back).

Don’t be afraid to pass the ball to your teammates, in the end you will get more opportunities with the ball. Give and you shall receive. A fundamental part of the game and an important lesson in life.

On the court and in life. Remember to give and you will be sure to receive.

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: The Power of Positive

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I love quotes. I use a couple of my own from time to time and I love finding quotes that fuel me.

If I talk to one of my kids before their games I always end with, “Play hard and have fun!” When I sign my memoir I use, “Always believe in you.” And when I was coaching I searched out quotes to encourage and inspire. Our locker room walls were covered in quotes, my coaches and I would text quotes to the players and I would use quotes in my pre-game speeches. Our team was surrounded with positive energy, added fuel to the fire of our intended goals.

During the five years that I was head coach, I watched the energy change with our team. My final year, we were in no way perfect, but we grew as a team and placed 6th in State and more importantly, we grew as a group of young women who learned to stay positive in the face of a challenge, and positive quotes were one small piece of the puzzle.

What are some of your favorite quotes?

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Find Your Groove.

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Sonya Elliott – AAU Basketball 1983


Some people have a natural shot. I’m not one of those people, but with time on the court, hard work and heart, I became a good shooter. There are better shooters for sure, but I have always been good enough to help my team and that is all that matters to me.

Learning to shoot can be a challenge. I know it has been tough for my kids because they get conflicting advise. Mom (former college basketball player and a basketball coach for 25 years) tells them one thing and Dad (former college athlete) tells them another. My daughter never wanted to do extra shooting around my husband and I, because our opinions differed. In the end it didn’t matter who was giving the correct coaching techniques for shooting (though I believe it was me), what mattered was the effect upon my daughter. The conflict caused her to stop doing extra shooting through much of high school. It was difficult for her to take on, and execute, two different opinions so instead she focused on other parts of her game. She is a well-rounded player that rebounds, passes and plays tenacious defense with the best of them, and she can score (she has a nice shot), but it hasn’t been until this summer that she has wanted to find her own space, and shoot again.

Having parents and coaches on the same page is so important. It is not always easy to find middle ground with two coaching parents, for a parent to support a coach with a different style, or for an assistant coach to follow a head coaches techniques and philosophy, however it is better for a player to have less conflict, to know what is expected of them on the court. Then they can focus their energy and feel more confident.

If you’re a player, set a shooting goal for yourself, 20 shots a day, 400 a week, 1000 a summer, whatever works for you and have some fun while you’re at it. With repetition on the court, you will start to feel what is right for you and your body. I’ve told my daughter, “You know the basics, start close to the basket and work your way out, shoot with a balanced foundation, keep your elbow in, have a relaxed follow through, and just go out and shoot.”

My daughter will be playing basketball at Pacific University next year so this summer she is running and lifting and finding her way to the gym to shoot. To improve your shot, put in the time, listen to your coaches, and most of all listen to your heart and you will find your groove.

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Charli Elliott High School Senior 2014-15 Photo Credit – Paul Mosley

 

 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Stop the Madness, It’s Just a Game

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I was at my son’s Junior Varsity High School summer recreation game last night when some parent madness was unleashed. Now understand, I am aware of the crazy antics of some high school parents, I spent three of my five years as a varsity head coach with a few of the parent telling lies about me and trying to get me fired, these parents are out there, but this, let me remind you, was a JUNIOR VARSITY Summer Rec-Tournament game.

It had been a great game. A tough fought battle. Both teams had played aggressive, intense basketball. Both teams fired up 3-balls from way beyond the arc and the lead switched back and forth throughout the game. It was the type of game players, coaches and fans live for, and the type of game that make players and teams better, win or lose. Yes, you want to win, you want your kid’s team to win, but it is also a game. And losing with honor and grace is important, not only for the players, but for the parents as well.

I’m not sure why I even allowed myself to get involved, except for that fact that one mother held a young child in her arms as two crazed moms got in her face. About what exactly I did not know, but this was not right. Myself and several others stepped between the madness until a man three-times our size made his own wall. Still the mom’s bickered, throwing F-bombs in front of the crowd and young boys and continued as they exited the gym. One parent asked me what I was thinking stepping into the mix as I was half the size of the women. I explained I felt like I had to step in because of the child, and besides I’d guarded women twice my size on a basketball court my entire life, I didn’t think twice about the fact that I could hold my own with these women. Maybe I didn’t factor in biting and scratching or God forbid guns and knives, but should I have to?

What has happened to the game, to the atmosphere around young athletes sports activities in recent years. Have we lost sight of what athletics are all about? There should be competition, yes, but sports are also about the lessons that come from the game, win or lose.  Enjoy the hard fought battles. Celebrate the wins. Learn from the loses. Be a good sport and let’s teach our children what is really important in life.

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: New Beginnings

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A new coach was named at the high school where I was head coach for five years. It’s a weird feeling to know that the girls who I have grown to care about and love, will be led by someone new. Yet, I also know that they will be fine, that learning to work with a new leader on the court will be good for them. It is a great lesson for life, because throughout their lifetime they will experience a lot of change, they will have to work with new bosses and a variety of co-workers, and figure out who they are, and how they fit in, along the way.

I have heard that the new coach is quite the opposite of me, and there is nothing wrong with that. All coaches have different styles. Pat Summit, C. Vivian Stringer, Mike Krzyzewski, John Wooden, all have had excellent results through different teaching methods. But what is important is that a coach has the best interest of the team in mind, because not only is a coach helping to develop young men and women, but in the case of high school basketball where there is no recruiting, a coach is working with the team they are given, so they are helping them to become better, stronger athletes, teaching them to work together on the court and creating a season that, win or lose, the players can be proud of.

I wish all the best to my girls and their new coach and I can’t wait to cheer them on to another successful season. Go Wildcats!

Variety is the Spice of Life: Say NO to playing select sports year-round

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Say NO to playing select sports year-round.

My daughter is doing her senior project on this subject. Her instructor wasn’t crazy about the idea, but my daughter was adamant that it was an important topic and stuck to her guns. I agree. Today’s young athletes start specializing way too early and often for all the wrong reasons.

When I was young we played select sports because we loved to play. We wanted to play more and try to be the best. Today young athletes (often with pressure from their parents) play because they believe it will give them the upper hand for an athletic scholarship. But what most don’t understand is that playing one sport year round not only costs more than college itself, it often puts young athletes in harm’s way emotionally and physically.

 Fact: Less than 2% of high school athletes receive an athletic scholarship to help pay for college, of those very few are full-ride scholarships.

 Fact: Playing year-round sports from a young age leads to overuse injuries and burnout.

Early and continual play of a specific sport does not come with a guarantee of a college athletic scholarship, but it does come with a big price tag. Select sports teams are big business these day. Playing on a top-level team can cost between $8000-$10,000 a year. Yes, I said one year. And many parents pay for private lessons for the athletes as well. The money spent on these programs could go to their college tuition and their high school programs, many of which struggle with funding. (When I took over a head coaching position the program had $4 and 4 uniforms. This is unacceptable and another blog all its own).

I’m not saying athletes that love a specific sport shouldn’t play it more. I just think as a society we’ve gone over the top. I love basketball and played select during high school, but I didn’t pay to play. Instead my teammates and I had to fundraise to travel, we had to work together on and off the court to be successful. A lesson all it’s own. And I participated in different sports throughout high school, giving my body and mind the opportunity to rest and grow.

I say YES to all athletics!!! I love sports. But let’s keep our children’s bodies and minds healthy. Young athletes should try different sports and activities and wait until they are older to start playing select sports. Remember, variety is the spice of life.

MORE INFO AND LINKS:

  • OVER ONE HALF of middle school and high school athlete’s INJURIES ARE DUE TO OVERUSE, which means that half of youth sports injuries are preventable.
  • OVERUSE INJURIES ARE CAUSED BY USING THE SAME MUSCLES AND LIGIMENTS OVER AND OVER. As a result they snap, break, and tear. This includes stress fractures, osteochondral injuries and problems with growth plates.
  • There has been a 400 % INCREASE in anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) injuries in teens and adolescents over a 10 year period in Philadelphia
  • According to Dr. David Grey, director of Orthopedics at Cook Children’s Hospital, there is a lot of pressure in the select world of sports to play one sport year-round, and with this, athletes get a lot of REPETITIVE TRAUMA and are more PRONE TO INJURIES in general.
  • Cross training can help to ease the stress that youth put on their body by building up different muscles, and not overusing them. PLAYING MULTIPLE SPORTS BUILDS A HEALTHIER CHILD.
  • 45% OF PLAYERS 6-17 YEARS OLD QUIT A SPORT they were playing. Top reason: they weren’t having fun.
  • Burnout occurs as a combination of TOO MUCH TIME SPENT PLAYING one sport and EMOTIONAL PRESSURE from parents.

Books related to burnout:

The Sport Parent’s Manual: What Young Athletes Really Want Their Parent’s to Know.

Whose Game Is It, Anyway?: A Guide to Helping Your Child Get the Most from Sport, Organized by Age and Stage.

Link to Athletic Scholarship information:

8 Things You Should Know About Sports Scholarships (CBS News)

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Life In Triple -Threat

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I had the opportunity to speak to the seniors at my old high school. And when I talked to them about setting goals and making choices, I brought basketball into the mix. It may not seem like there is a connection but let me explain.

When I play basketball my goal is to win, and in order to do that, our team must get more points than the other team. So, I play tough defense and every time I catch the ball, I catch it in triple-threat position, facing the basket (my goal). Triple-threat means I am a threat to the opponent in three ways, I can shoot, pass or drive. I must read the defense, assess my options, and make a choice. Just like I do in life.

If I’m open and in my range, I might shoot the ball. If I see my teammate cutting to the basket, I might pass her the ball for a shot, or if the defense is in my face, I might drive to the hoop. Just like in life, you look at your options and then make a choice. It may not be the perfect choice, (you may miss your shot or make a bad pass) but if you have your goal in mind, it’s okay, keep moving, try again.

It’s when you let go of your goals and dribble away from the basket, that you get into trouble. I explained to the seniors, that to me, skipping class and partying when you want to get a college degree, is like dribbling away from the basket, with your goal out of sight.

Life is about setting goals and making good choices, or like I like to think of it, catching the ball in triple-threat, ready to help my team win.

Sonya Elliott - Class of 1984 University High School
Sonya Elliott – Class of 1984
University High School

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Do You Hear Me?

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I heard basketballs bouncing outside when I was writing this week. Kids were shooting baskets in our front yard. (Not my kids, but not an uncommon occurrence since we put a basketball hoop in our front yard two years ago). I heard my husband say, “You should be using your left hand on the left side,” before he walked in the house on his way home from work.

I gave him a kiss and then headed to the door. I couldn’t let it go. (No longer a high school coach, but always a coach.) I lined up all three boys on a seam in the concrete. “Ok, pretend you’ve got a string attached from your left knee up to your elbow.” I lifted my arm and brought up my knee. “Like a puppet.” I explained some more. I had them do it with me ten times. They looked at me like I was a crazy, but they obliged me with some puppetry.

“Now let’s try a couple at the basket.” Of course they all ran back about ten yards to get a run at the hoop and I had to corral them in. I would make this a short lesson, I would have plenty more chances to follow-up.  “Right here guys. One step from the basket.” I said. “Step with your right, and then go up with your left hand and left knee.” They tried. It was awkward. They missed shots. They didn’t like it.

“That looks great!” I said. Once again they looked at me like I was crazy. “Now every day that you’re on this court I expect you to practice a left-handed lay-in at least ten times. Okay?” I received some hesitant nods and some eye rolling. “I’m not kidding.” I said and then walked back into the house with a smile.

The next day I poked my head out the door when I heard a ball bouncing and there was one of the boys practicing his left-handed lay-in. I caught his attention and gave him a thumbs up.

Sometimes kids take in what you do and say even if it may not seem like it. You never know who might be listening. 

 

PeaceLoveBasketball Friday: Change Is Hard

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I made a tough decision this week to step down as the Head Girl’s Basketball Coach at West Seattle High School. I have been in tears off and on since that day.

When I took over the program five years ago I wanted to bring change. The program had struggled over the years and there was no support. In fact, I had 4 uniforms and $4 to start that first season. I spent pre-season hunting down uniforms from graduates and putting together fundraisers to get the team equipped. My assistant coach and I, ended that first season with six players who brought in 3 wins in one of the toughest leagues in the state of Washington. The last five years have been challenging, but the girls and the coaches, have worked hard to help build the program, so that this year we had Varsity, Junior Varsity and JVC squads and seven coaches. The West Seattle Girl’s Basketball program now has three Metro Sound Division Titles, a Metro League Championship and they placed 6th in State, but most of all the players are a group of focused and caring young women who play with a lot of heart. And that’s why it brings me to tears when I think about my decision to leave, because I care about each and every one of them.

Change is hard.

However, just because a decision is difficult, it doesn’t mean it’s not the right decision. I had to look at what my family needed and make my decision based on that. As other coaches know, being a head coach at the high school level is not an easy job, and to be competitive, it’s damn close to a full-time job, and unfortunately a majority of the time is not spent coaching. As head coach you, of course coach, and are in charge of practices and games, but you are planner and organizer, fundraiser, accountant, travel agent, secretary, counselor, email correspondent, open-gym opener, summer league organizer, parent issue manager and summer camp coordinator, to name a few of the main tasks. Each, not that big of deal, but together they become time-consuming and I even forgot to mention the paperwork. So what I’m saying, is to coach basketball at the high school level and do it right, you must be in. (And not for the money, because, there is little of that.) It must be because you LOVE the game. And I was all in, and would never change that. Those five years mean the world to me, but I was ready for a change. And now that the program is strong and the girl’s believe in themselves, and the school and the community believe in them, and in what they can do, it was time for me to leave.

I know it can’t be easy for the girls, as I have coached some of them for their entire high school careers . However, though change is hard, it is not always bad. It’s a time to learn and grow and challenge oneself. For me, I plan to focus on family and writing and looking at opportunities to help my kids pay for college. For my former players (I still think of them as mine), it will be an opportunity for them to work with someone new, expand their basketball knowledge, help one another to continue to stay close and connected and tight as a team. And I know they can do it. My (did I just say MY again?) three-year juniors, will need to take the leadership roles that they are each so capable of and help the team to be strong again next year. Not only on the court as players and teammates, but off the court where they they will grow as young women.

And as they do, I will be cheering them on every step of the way!

 

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